August week 1

Tiger Dad

One of my childhood fears was towards my father. I don't know if that was a legitimate fear or just a typical form of reverence towards all fathers, but I remember mine being a little more than that. This fear is not necessarily instigated from punishments for not living up to mark in terms of academic rather it's attributed to his overall strict and straightforward character. My siblings and I know very well when is the correct time to joke and when to be serious. I believe my father's no nonsense ways is derived from his upbringing as a young child. He knew what it was like to be faced with hardship, to be independent and toil for what he wanted all by himself. Indubitably, the strength to succeed with the equipment of a rigid, resilient and firm facet gets anchored as his nature, bringing it to present times. So, we children, my siblings and I, are expected of the same. We were corrected sternly for every small flop including being careless with things that end up spoiled or malfunctioning for it would mean wasting hard earned money.We try not to provoke his anger at all cost as one blow could befall us with many serious penalties and consequence. But don't get me wrong, even if I sometimes disagree with some actions I would deem unjust or murmur and complain in my heart, I know that my father means no harm. It's his way of teaching us priceless values in life, his way of instilling propriety in us even though he may unconsciously cause despair inside us. It took me years of growing up to understand what he has been doing all these while and to appreciate his form of love with a genuine believe that it's for "your own good" as he says it. Now, with this realisation there's less resentment and less of being upset whenever he corrects. As for the fear, it has been greatly allayed as my father has mellowed down and shows a very different, kinder, more compromising side of him. The children are more comfortable around him and we can smile and laugh together. At the same time, we are always reminded to stay within good behaviors and not to evoke that all too familiar vexation.

Will I exemplify his strict rules to my future children? Yes. Simply because the formula works.

July week 4

Yesterday, I went out for a special occasion with my friends. It was sort of a celebratory party for my team's victory in the recent competition I mentioned before but we killed two birds with one stone by having it with other close friends, turning it into a social outing. We had a good mix of people, apart from the usual gang, we had other people whom we were meeting for the first time. It was definitely  different from the typical outings with the same group of people. To top it of,  it wasn't just hanging out idling our time in a mall or going for a movie, which we did after lunch, it was having a buffet lunch! Not just any buffet lunch, but a JAPANESE BUFFET LUNCH!! Yes, lunch! or brunch actually.  "Who eats japanese buffet for lunch?,"my dad queerly asked me. But he didn't stop me from going and even gave me the money to pay for my share.
 At this juncture, I'd like to add something that came to my mind. I feel blessed because we kids are privileged enough to afford this lavish and definitely not cheap buffet, being soaked into all the fun with no qualms of eating this sort of expensive food throughout lunch, all thanks to our parents. Dear urban kids, we should never boast about these luxury no matter how grown up we look or how grand we feel at that moment, unzipping our wallets to pay the enormous bill without any fuss, as we are undeserving. We have the spending ability and the freedom to own and do many things, but please bear in mind to always be grateful to our parents who worked their way from zero and through tough times to provide our every need and pave a way free from obstacles so that we children don't have to experience what they had.
Thanks mum and dad for everything. <3

July week 3

Since my life is nothing out of the ordinary, there's not much to write about here. I want to do this week's journal real quick so I don't intend to go into any heavy subjects. After some thought, I decided to talk about my pet.

I'm actually not that an animal person as I previously thought. I'm not that kind of person who has that genuine love and compassion towards animals but I do still care about them especially if they are my pets. My family got our first pet, a cute puppy of Lhasa Apso breed( quite similar to the Shitzu) when I was around 6 or 7 years old. (The pictures are not mine, from Google. Just an example.) Of course it's cute and cuddly like all puppies are. We named it Kiki as in Kiki Lala! But I ended up calling her with many other weird( really weird) nicknames. I'll be embarrassing myself if I were to name some of them, so I won't. And yes I loved it dearly, watching it grow bigger everyday. However, owning a pet comes with responsibility to take care of it because pets are not humans, they need to be taken care of like it or not. Looking back, I would say we made the wrong decision choosing this breed. Trust me, it's not because it's bad or anything, it's just not the right choice for my family when my brothers and I are barely old enough to care for ourselves. My parents were left with the burden of taking care of our dog. What's the big deal you ask? Well, a dog this breed has really really long fur( I believe it's gets longer than that of a Shitzu)   
Without much experience,it gets tough having to constantly comb and trim Kiki's fur. I still wonder why my parents didn't even suggest sending her for grooming( I only found out much later that there is such a place specifically for washing, shampooing, trimming and such for pets!) instead, my parents did all that by themselves with a little help here and there. Over time, it gets rather tiring. To add more burden, Kiki introduced ticks/fleas into our home and we'd have a killing-the-ticks session on and off. I was blamed a lot for not being diligent in my duty to comb Kiki's fur. So, it finally came that time when my parents thought it was time to bid farewell to Kiki. It shouldn't be called a farewell because it's not. My parents planned a secret mission to silently slip Kiki out of the house and hand it over to, I suspect, some people from SPCA with the help of my oldest brother. Till now I'm not really clear about how they successfully did it. It was about 8 pm, a Wednesday. I kind of sensed something at that time, I think I saw something suspicious of my brother, but I blame myself for not bothering to find out. I came back from tuition at 10 pm and started to notice that Kiki was no where to be seen. My parents finally came forth and told my brothers and I that she has been taken away. I think I shed some tears then. Imagine taking away a beloved pet which you are so attached to out of the blue,so swiftly. Thinking back, I could understand why my parents made that decision. It was just not the right time and a little too much to handle all by themselves. They bought a puppy for the children so that we can be happy, but we can't deny reality and rationality. Still, how I wished we could have gotten a dog that we could handle and not go through a premature goodbye to our pet. Now, after a decade since then, my family haven't gotten a replacement to Kiki, maybe some temporary guppy fish and just recently this year, two guinea pigs, upon the urge of my youngest sibling. But a new pet dog, no. We, my brothers and I, do look back and wonder if we could have done better taking care of Kiki, then probably she would still be with us today. I get mixed feelings thinking about her. Missing her hyperactivity, her company, calling her name, pampering her but at the same time thinking about how she had felt as though I abandoned her as I didn't say goodbye. What's done is done, that's all I can say. This whole experience has thought me a lot about responsibility especially when owning a pet. So to whoever who owns a pet of any kind, uphold your duties faithfully and care for it.
This post it not supposed to be long. Dang it! Never mind then, as long as I wrote something from my heart.

July week 2

Law Olympiad 2012

I just had a taste of sweet victory after a very long time. The Help University Law Olympiad 2012 was, I would say, my fist major competition in my five years of high school and I am elated that my team emerged as champion. I'm happier to achieve this feat though not on my own in a competition as big and grand as this just as its name suggests. I consider myself lucky to be part of my group as the rest of the members are more reliable and competent than myself. At the beginning, we were excited of the thought of venturing out of our comfort zone, challenging ourselves in a major competition as most of my team members who are also my closed friends are not the type who actively and voluntarily sign for every competition that crosses our path. But we decided to try it out largely because we were desperate to gain some credibility that might help us apply for tertiary education. Needless to say, we were in a state of shock and disbelief when we heard our team announced as the winner. Among all the jumping, laughter, hugging and celebration we doubted in our hearts,"This can't be right. There's got to be a mistake somewhere." But we didn't want to spoil the moment, if there was any correction to the outcome let us cry of sadness later, for now, we're winners! Want to know the honest truth? We came completely and I mean completely unprepared. It was as if we're just going to an event outing, uninterested of our competitors. When we said we must win among ourselves, it was merely a joke, a far-fetched dream just enough to amuse ourselves. When my friend told me that the past winners of this competition prepared really hard for it and the most we did was flipping through pages of a thick fat book about famous quotes at the last minute and hoping that our trump card, Nicole whose parents are both lawyers, is all set to take the main role, I knew reaching a top position was impossible. In one of the games in the competition, we screwed up so badly till we didn't have the motivation to carry on with the next game. From three objectives joining this competition, 1. Fat hopes of winning it, 2. To at least earn a certificate of participation and 3. Gaining experience, we would only get to comfort ourselves with objective number 3, so I thought. We were feeling down in the drain as we thought that we couldn't even manage to get top 10. At that moment when we heard our team called out, it was so surreal. I didn't know what to feel, my entire body was trembling and cold and smiling for the camera was the most uncomfortable thing to do at that moment. But somehow we managed, how can we not? It was a special and not to mention rare moment for my friends and I who are the mind-our-own-business type in school. Most evidently at that time was how much I appreciated my team and my gratitude towards them for making this achievement possible. All in all, I'm happy to have participated in a competition representing my school and I'm thankful for having this amazing experience that I will certainly remember for a very long time. All due credit to the Law Faculty of Help University for organising such a wonderful event, not to mention all the interesting and intriguing games that we truly enjoyed.

July week 1

I had a rare opportunity to attend an orchestra last Saturday at the KLCC Philharmonic Hall. I was actually a replacement for one of my brother's friends who pulled out, so the 'free' ticket was given to me. Along with my brother's three friends, we went to Suria KLCC earlier for dinner at Ben's Restaurant before the performance. I totally didn't expect to have had a chance to eat in such a lavish restaurant! I count myself very lucky. I hope my overly excited antics didn't scare my brother's friend whom I had just met. The dress code for the evening was smart casual and it was required for us to dress accordingly if not we would be prohibited to enter. After dinner, we rushed to the grand hall for the orchestra performance, yes rush! We were one of those few who entered into the hall just a minute before the show started! Many eyes were on us as we with our thick faces found our seats and quickly sat down. The conductor and the special guest violinist took to the stage and soon beautiful music at its finest filled the hall. Every one there was soaking in the music from beautiful pieces that was supposed to be rendition of Bethovan's classic pieces. I don't doubt that they were of Bethovans', it's just that I wouldn't know because basically I don't know anything about music. I look around me and I saw a man sitting across me being so drowned in the music, as his head slightly tilted down, the emotions in his eyes followed the emotions of the music and his fingers fidgeted not out of nervousness but in sheer immersion into the music. I was amazed at this man and many others whose expressions shows how much they appreciated the music in their ears. And there I thought I could fake how much I 'loved' and understood music by closing my eyes and pretend that I was under the spell of the orchestra with my ears all perked up to the music. But hey, I'm not too bad, I tried to feel what the other audiences were feeling and wanted to understand the beauty of the music, though I admit I could never reach that level of emotion as of the conductor as he conducted the orchestra with all his heart and soul. All conductors do. At the same time, I took advantage of being in the hall to observe not only the passionate audiences but also the fine interior of the hall. I got to see for real the different seatings according to class and boxes as they call it catered for a more private viewing space. Being there reminded me of 'The Phantom of the Opera' that I studied for Literature but sadly there wasn't any chandelier in that place. Have I mentioned that from my seat the immediate view is the legs of the musicians with their polished shoes? LOL! We couldn't see beyond the row of violinists, basically the violin was the only instrument we could identify and maybe a trumpet at the back. We had to make do with that as we paid for the cheapest seating.=) This is definitely one of my precious experiences though not perfect, but hey, how many of us can say that we actually went to an orchestra? :-D

June week 5

Another book assigned to me to read is called 'Bleak House' by Charles Dickens. Unlike the first book 'Rebecca' which managed to win my interest from the beginning, Bleak House was a tough one to read at first. Riding on my rare keenness to read after enjoying 'Rebecca', I just wanted to get on with this next book. But before I could to attempt to drown myself into the story, a friend of mine dared me to read the first page and understand it. I did that and lifted my head from behind the book and laughed with my friend. She proved herself right. I think it was deliberate that the author introduced the story in such a confusing way, no head or tail. There is a lot on Jarndyce and Jarndyce, an ongoing court case that could never be resolved and about muddy and damp streets in London. I couldn't wrap my mind around this and with an unimpressive start, I dragged on. It took me a few days just to move to another chapter, trust me it's actually really short, given it's a short version of the book. Luckily, I finally understood the story as I went on and found myself even liking it. Instead of the dreary court matters that is spotlighted, most of the story circled around  Esther, Ada and Richard. I liked the even focus on the three characters, Richard's deadly obsession with the Jarndyce and Jarndyce case as he hopes for a big fortune out of it, Ada's solicitude towards Richard and Esther's discovery of her birth mother as well as her relationship with her guardian, John Jarndyce and her lover, Allan Woodcourt. Overall, the mood of the story is rather bleak as its name suggests, but the storyline is quite brilliant and I quickly forgot how hard it was to read this book at the beginning.